This movie interviewed a number of masculine, homosexual men who behaved and engaged in rather rugged activities, sports, hobbies, and jobs, as well as contrasted some of these men's opinions with two other gay men who were more effeminate in their nature.
We found the movie interesting and it sparked an excellent conversation, both right after it was over as well as on Sunday morning when we were snuggled closely watching the sunrise.
One of the interviewees was Jack Donovan (aka Jack Malebranche) who wrote a book titled, "Androphilia: A Manefesto" in 2007. This was the first time we had heard of this man and his book. While he had the shortest interview during the entire film, some of the points he made rang close to the thoughts that both my partner and I have: that we have a healthy male-male attraction, and that we reject some of the labels and stereotypes brought with the label "gay."
We believe that the male-male relationship that we have is consistent with our own behavior and masculinity, which Donovan described as "androphilia." That word is derived from the Greek, "Andro" (Man) and "philia" (Like). Donovan's contention is that "gay" is:
...inseparable from connotations of effeminacy and "a whole cultural and a political movement that promotes anti-male feminism, victim mentality, and leftist politics."While I don't agree about the swipe at "leftist politics," I do generally agree that the label "gay" causes lots of negative thoughts (and actions) by the straight world. In particular, many (not all, but many) in the straight world have a common misconception that all gay men are frilly-froo-froo queens, and cannot look, act, or behave in a typical masculine manner. My partner and I, among several of those interviewed in this film, are here to disprove that notion. (And let me tell 'ya, being a masculine man whose sexual orientation is male-male, I have encountered a number of times when straight guys are confused as heck by me. So be it, they need to learn that not all "gays" are the same.)
Kevin said to me, "I think he proposes that there is no gay archetype or identity for that matter and to attempt to build one's self perception around something as basic as who one is sexually attracted to is limiting." I absolutely agree, as does my partner.
The narrator in the movie said that "Androphilia" caused a lot of controversy in the "gay community" (however defined.) Perhaps gay people who read it didn't like the opinion that "gay" is a label or "catch-all" phrase whereas people who are male and like other men do not all fit in one certain "catch-all" mold.
My partner and I never quite knew what to call ourselves, and generally used the term gay for lack of something else. Face it, we're "homosexual" and a label by any other name is just as sweet (pardon the mixed metaphors.)
Life is short: continue to learn about yourselves.
2 comments:
"Mark" left a comment which wasn't posted, but made me re-think some of my thoughts expressed in this post. Thanks, "Mark." I edited this post accordingly. I'm a guy who is in love with another guy... that's pretty much it, and call it what you will.
The essence of what he said was this: "You might want to re-think (calling myself an androphile). Malebranche is a far, far right-winger. Much more so than he lets on in his book.
"Getting homosexual men to refer to themselves as Androphiles is more about him building a cult around himself and attempting to position himself as an alpha-male. ... Dude's got issues. Don't encourage him."
So by my edits, I'm not encouraging. But I am remarking that a label isn't clear about who I am, and how my partner and I relate to one another. Thanks, Mark. Since your blogger profile was hidden, I didn't post your comment but quoted from it for this "joint commentary."
/BHD
Thanks for directing me to this post, BHD. I'm going to have to check out that movie.
You are the only person I've come across besides myself who has read or even is aware of the book Androphilia. You certainly are a prime example of the kind of man Donovan (or Malebranche) exhaults. (Take that as a compliment. I mean that in terms of your masculinity, not your politics.)
I wasn't aware of Donovan being an extreme right-winger. In fact, if anything I would have assumed him to be a radical, i.e. extreme liberal. What I did notice, because it's noted in his bio on the book, and paid more attention to is that he was (at the time the book was published) a Satanic priest. According to Wikipedia, he left the Satanic Church in 2009.
As the Church Lady might say, "Well.....isn't that special."
-Hank
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