Oh Brother, It's My Brother (Again)

Guest Blog Post by BHD's Twin Brother

My "big" brother, all of four minutes older than me, is going through a rough spot right now. As you read on his blog, he is grieving for the loss of an elected leader with whom he worked in his volunteer civic activities where he lives. This sudden death struck quite a blow to his emotions. He cares so much that he hurts really bad inside when life takes a turn for the worse.

I called him on Sunday and we had a really long, long talk. What rang through so clearly to me as we talked was how much of a big heart my brother has. He wears his heart on his sleeve, and he gets hurt sometimes. But that's what makes this guy so special, to all of us who love him.

He told me that each and every single one of us brothers and sisters called him once they heard the news and the email began to flow on our family grapevine. That's such a neat thing. You'd think all of us as adults who have our own lives and things going on might be busy or not think that our brother may need some attention. It really makes both of us smile warmly to know that after all these years, the lessons Mom and Dad taught us continue to be demonstrated today.

During our conversation, he put me on hold a couple times when the doorbell rang. When he returned to the phone, he mentioned all too casually that kind old ladies dropped over to bring him some of his favorite cookies and a cake. He told me that his closest friends have been checking in as well -- some we grew up with, and some he has befriended and made close through things he does in the community where we grew up, on the 'net, and elsewhere. I don't know how many or who all of these people are; my brother makes me dizzy with all he does and all the people he knows. I tell you, my brother cares about the whole world, but it is so gratifying to us who love him to know that the world "cares back."

We believe in having a wide net to support us. When my brother does his high-wire act to work full-time at a job he loves, to care for his partner, to serve his community, to support the older folks who need help from time to time, and to care for our Aunt and our extensive family, everyone tends to think that he never needs any help or attention. Well, there are times he does. We in the family extend our love, our support, our thanks and our praise, as do his friends.

Stringing the net of compassion and caring builds a network upon which my brother draws strength. Thanks, everyone -- many of whom I do not know -- for caring for this big lug of a heart. He really appreciates it, as do I.

He is still my number one cheerleader, but at the moment let me cheer him back, with love and all of my heart. What a special man, who I treasure each day I have the esteemed honor to call him "Brother." Let's hear it for this guy!